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JETT THE ZOOMER

The Hypercharged Zoomer

Jett is the Duckiverse's Gen Z whirlwind. He speaks fluent meme, hyper-focuses on conspiracy TikToks, and somehow always knows the latest drama before it happens. Raised on caffeine and questionable subreddits, Jett can decode internet trends in seconds—but still can't figure out how to unclog a sink or pay his rent on time.

He’s convinced the Duckiverse is part of some elaborate simulation, but also fully believes he’s the “main character.” While often exasperating to the others (especially Bossy), Jett occasionally stumbles into bizarre strokes of insight that even Steven can’t explain. Just don't ask him to explain how taxes work.

Catchphrases:

  1. “Bro, I cracked the algorithm!”

  2. “You heard this new podcast.” (awful nonsense)

_Cartoon-style Zoomer duck, hyperactive energy, dual-wielding gaming controller and energy

JETT THE ZOOMER

Class: Techno-Savant / Reality Casualty

Origin Story (Bio):

 Jett was born in a server room during a firmware update and imprinted on a GPU fan. Raised on a steady diet of energy drinks, Discord arguments, and obscure programming languages, he learned to code before he learned to walk. He’s the type of guy who can jailbreak a government satellite with a phone app but once tried to microwave a Pop-Tart in the foil.

Jett lives deep in the manaverse, wearing five headsets at once, convinced he's seducing a synth-princess from a parallel dimension (he is not). He refers to ChatGPT as his “brother from another buffer,” and he once fell in love with an NFT. Despite being frighteningly good with AI and emerging tech, Jet has no idea how taxes work, thinks avocados grow underground, and still isn’t 100% clear where the sun goes at night.

He is endearingly earnest, painfully overconfident, and the living embodiment of “no thoughts, just WiFi.” And yet, somehow, Jett always seems to stumble into breakthroughs. He might not know where he is—but he always knows where the Pattern is going.

🎯 Likes:

  • Lagless code
     

  • Girls who say “upload me daddy” (they don’t)
     

  • Quoting his billionaire idol out of context / defending said billionaire like it was his own father
     

  • High-level tinkering with zero safety protocols
     

  • Group chats where he gets to be the admin

🚫 Dislikes:

  • Nature
     

  • Instructions longer than three bullet points
     

  • The phrase “touch grass”
     

  • Having to explain memes to Boomers
     

  • When the WiFi goes out and he briefly remembers mortality

​

Signature Moves:
âš¡ Hyperwire Surge — Moves at blinding digital speed, processing vast streams of info while confusing enemies.
 

🎮 Code Skip — Instantly glitches minor rules of reality, bypassing obstacles as if using cheat codes.

📱 JETT THE ZOOMER’S FAVORITES

🎵 Favorite Song:
“bad guy” by Billie Eilish (Nightcore Version)
Jet heard the regular version once and said, “Too slow.” Listens exclusively on 1.75x speed. Bonus points if it's part of a cursed TikTok slideshow.

🎬 Favorite Film:
“Everything Everywhere All At Once”
Because obviously. He saw himself in all timelines simultaneously and now he thinks googly eyes are spiritual symbols. Cried for 3 hours. Tweeted through it.

📖 Favorite Book:
A PDF of “The Art of War” he never finished
Only read the quotes. Uses them to win Twitter arguments. Swears it changed his life, but can’t explain how. Once called it "Sun Tzu’s masterclass in main character energy."

Favorite Food: Flamin' Hot Cheetos rolled into a gas station burrito

Bonus Detail: Refuses to drink still water—only sparkling, and only if it has “vibes.” Once tried to charge his vape with a potato. It almost worked.

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