TINA
The Spiritually Exhausted Sage
Tina is the Duckiverse’s resident millennial burnout.
She’s deeply spiritual — or at least trying to be — but often finds herself too tired to do anything except sip iced coffee and light some sage.
Despite her avoidance, she’s wiser than she thinks, and when she speaks, the room tends to listen.
Catchphrases:
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“Me and my bae, we're dunzo again.”
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“The universe is testing me again.”
TINA
Class: Spiritually Burnt-Out Millennial / Reluctant Oracle
Origin Story (Bio):
Tina grew up in the Shadow of the Great Reset, raised on a steady diet of astrology memes, student debt, and gluten-free trauma. She once opened her third eye during a guided meditation and immediately closed it again when it started asking questions. With a library of self-help books she’s never finished and a crystal collection that may or may not be just pretty rocks, Tina is the soul of reluctant wisdom.
She met Debbie in a hot yoga class she didn't want to attend and hasn’t been able to get rid of her since. Tina is the avoidant to Debbie’s anxious. The incense to Debbie’s Febreze. The existential sigh to Debbie’s motivational quote poster.
Despite her sarcastic exterior, Tina can read the room like a tarot deck. She just won’t admit it. She claims she’s not “part of the pattern,” but somehow she always shows up right before something big happens. She’s got a talent for duckside commentary and delivering brutal truths with a sip of boxed wine and an arched eyebrow.
She wears oversized sweaters, carries a journal she never writes in, and can astrally project on command but refuses to do it unless someone else pays for brunch.
🎯 Likes:
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Saying “same” when confronted with cosmic truths
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Charging her crystals but never herself
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Duck documentaries (ironically)
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Avoiding group texts for spiritual reasons
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Binging entire self-help podcasts and doing none of it
🚫 Dislikes:
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Boomers who use too many emojis
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Anyone who says “just stay positive!”
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Mercury in retrograde (even when it’s not)
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Questions about her “career path”
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Debbie’s scrapbook full of dreamboards
Signature Moves:
🧘 Avoidance Aura — Slips into a meditative trance mid-crisis, forcing others to solve the problem first.
💫 Selective Vibration — Chooses which advice resonates with her in the moment, regardless of logic.
🧘♀️ TINA’S FAVORITES
🎵 Favorite Song:
“Motion Sickness” by Phoebe Bridgers
It’s on every playlist she makes. She’ll say, “It’s not just the lyrics, it’s the texture of the pain.” No one knows what that means, but everyone nods.
🎬 Favorite Film:
Her
She saw it in theaters and cried the whole Uber ride home. She once said, “The AI was the most emotionally available character, and that says something,” while looking directly at Stux.
📖 Favorite Book:
The Body Keeps the Score
She hasn’t read past chapter three, but she recommends it to everyone. She highlights things and then forgets why. Tina believes all healing begins with awareness… and ends with a nap.
Favorite Food: Avocado toast with truffle oil
Bonus Detail: Spends 40 minutes arranging it for an Instagram story she never posts.